This week in politics men are having hearings about a woman’s reproductive rights and their needs as a human being – I am appalled! Who do men think they are discussing such issues without listening to women. How can a man know anything about what it is like to be a woman, have a period, getting impregnated, carrying to term and the myriad of feelings and physiological changes that a woman goes through.
Maybe a physician could discuss this with more sensitivity and intelligence but where was that committee? Half of our congress is in denial about climate change – that is something we can all see! I will not trust the “sensitivity” of a politician when it comes to my personal issues as a woman unless they are respecting me enough to listen to me and are interested in protecting women in general. This after all is the whole purpose to our government, to respect and protect the rights of a human being.
If this conversation was flipped on the other side – men would freak out and say, “you don’t have a penis, how can you know what that is like – oh yeah you women must be jealous of the penis!” Give me a break, no woman is jealous of your penises okay – that is your preoccupation.
My uterus is not for sale, it is not for rent, it is not an apartment for the government. This is a personal rights issue and unless men are asking women questions and asking what they want in that regard – they have no business or right to decide for anyone else.
What the hell did we get the vote for in the 20’s? You men that lord over females and think you are elevated above them are the ones I am worried about. If you do not trust that others have the dignity and respect to take care of themselves – that clearly shows the rest of the whole world that you must not be taking care of yourselves or you would not be preoccupied with women’s rights and those of the gay community.
This week Palin said, “go out and annoy a liberal.” If this is how the GOP deals with things by creating drama and in-fighting no wonder we have not resolved anything in thirty years. I want politicians coming up with solutions that work for the highest good for the most people. I want to see win-win situations and compromises, not a chess game with constant stalemates. Any politician who is only interested in pointing out the problems with no actual solutions should have no right to stay in politics.
These people work for us, we pay for their salaries out of our tax dollars. The corrupt people in power should have to be accountable for their crimes – everyone else is accountable for what they do… the elite do not deserve having lower taxes than the rest of us. Where is our fair and balanced system? Where are the petitions of our government to protect our basic rights.
Last October the Protection of Life Act Bill was passed. This gives the hospitals, doctors and staff the order to allow a woman to die in the face of a life-death complication of a pregnancy — they are not allowed to give an abortion to a woman without insurance who would die without it! This is a direct and open war fare on American women. This is the American government I am talking about. I have rights, I am a human being, I have the right to live. Where is the concern for my life, safety and well-being?
Who is stupid enough to think that saving a baby while allowing the mother to die is good for the infant? What infant wants to live without a mother if given that choice? I am so angry and resentful that my government has taken to killing innocent women who are hard-working and who do not have insurance – really, murder is the answer? Like I really believe your system can care for my baby when you do not even care for me.
Worrying for your kids constantly does not help them and it essentially makes you completely ineffective in your whole life. Worrying is a habitual fear that runs the mind ragged. When we are worrying and projecting (into the future or onto others) we are not being emotionally present and available to us or our kids or anyone else.
One must be calm and centered to be healthy in our lives. We need to be calm and centered if we are going to be able to see the possible opportunities all around us at every moment and to be able to respond in healthy ways. Start with acceptance of this painful truth in your reality because with that acknowledgment you can begin to change what you no longer value, what is not kind. Your changed, new behavior can produce results that may better support and encourage your life right now, instead of lamenting about the past mistakes you already made. Learn from them.
Let the guilt go, let the worrying control go and be present in your life right now. Everything is a choice. Your kids want structure with consequences that make sense so they can define who they are as developing young people. This requires being taught about respect from you, respect, boundaries with appropriate consequences. If you have no respect for yourself, your children will not respect you either. Check yourself. You control your children as much as you control anyone else – you don’t. You teach them through intelligence or emotionalism at every moment of the day. A lot of authority figures teach from fear and intimidation. No one respects that and most people know these feelings, even if as kids they cannot articulate it to you. You set up consequences as a parent or you do not and your kids make their own choices in their own head about their own behavior. Emotions can only manipulate them for so long. Kids value the real you and fairness. This is present in all young human beings until their life experiences hurt them so much, that they finally just accept that all people are manipulative and dismissive as a part of our lives. They accept this about their families, themselves and the whole system of our social structure and the world at large. This explains the hopelessness of our nation, that “this is the way things are” and regular folks cannot change that. This is painful to face about yourself because it is a form of slavery that we inflict upon ourselves. This is not winning any prizes for humanity. It is not control either, it is actually evil and breaking the spirit of an individual.
If you have guilt or carry any other unresolved emotional burdens – address them as soon as possible because kids learn to cope the exact way you actually are and not by what you say. Actions and innate feelings speak louder than words. If you have accepted that all of life and people suck all the way around, go back to when you first accepted this bitter pill about humanity and change the only human you can, you.
If you are hateful, dismissive, distant and this is what you bring to your kids everyday, they will work so hard to be just like you only exponentially. People wonder why their kids are so “awful” and they are only reflecting back what they have been shown at home. Kids think if their parents are so upset by them, then they must really bad themselves. And so the chain of abusive manipulative emotional unresolved issues becomes a part of every moment of their reality’s life.
You cannot control your kids, you teach them to fear you or respect you ~ there is no in between. Abuse is abuse and manipulation is manipulation. In the end, was the illusion of control worth the time away from your own humanity? Ultimately we all make our own choices and as adults we can take more control. Adults can choose to change themselves at any time, what you believe about what you know can change if you challenge it within. Acknowledge the little lost soul within you, it is a witness to your free will and actions. In the end, you will have to face the truth inside of you and your soul may be very angry at the choices you have continually, habitually made in the judgment of itself. This is every individual’s price to bear… will your soul say, “thank you for giving me dignity and allowing me to know that self-love, acceptance and respect” or will it say, “you left me at the gate and kept abusing me and salting my wounds for every moment as you found no peace within you and now the opportunity to face yourself with love and forgiveness is passed, now you must consciously go on knowing every choice you never rectified.
Big surprise kids! Our government is trying to censor biology in schools now that Tennessee Senator Stacey Campfield got his state Senate to pass this disgusting bill dis-allowing the use of the term “gay.” I find it disturbing people hide behind “Christianity” to infringe on the rights of others. Way to not only dumb down our country’s kids even more but this also creates alienation and shame in a child (who might or might not be gay) judging them with something that is natural and normal human behavior.
The View’s talking heads fail to realize that this is a human rights issue because it is government censorship of scientific fact and it is social bullying designed to alienate any LGBT human being or developing child out there.
Stacey Campfield made the comparison of himself to Jesus and the civil rights activists of the 1960’s in his own blog.
The Daily Seed Feed is now liberated in it’s own tabbed section for the easiest access. Enjoy!
Have you decided how your day is going to be already? You can choose to make it great or not, it is entirely up to you. Our thoughts, our reactions are all a choice and every minute of the day, you have the opportunity to own it for the positive or for the negative. How are you going to choose to spend your day ~ empowered or not?
I used to think that emotions were the truth. I found that when I changed my behavior, my emotions quickly changed too. Soon after that my perception actually began to change and it allowed me to see the world with brand new eyes, with renewed eyes.
I just had an idea! I am starting a section called the Daily Seed–Feed (in the Healing Journey tab) where I will post a share of mine (daily) from meetings I shared in program starting back from two years ago up to now. You can follow along in my progress and process over the last two years and see my growth in recovering from being a compulsive people pleaser to learning how to care for myself and boundary my healthy behaviors.
I try to be sure I get the Daily Seeds up by at least noon EST every day. I hope you enjoy following along with me daily! I hope I can inspire and empower others to stand up for themselves too. Know that you are worth it!
Did you know that the average person has to hear something seven times before they are willing to even consider it once. Seven times! Repetition is fundamental to learning. It helps me to write lists and eve to speak aloud to myself so my other brain hemisphere hears it too.
The average attention span is only twenty minutes. You retain more of what you are studying if you can take a short 1-3 minute break every 20 minutes… I dare you to test it out to see if it works for you as well as it works for me!
Life is a process to be lived, perceived and reflected upon. We are spiritual beings in chemical clothing having one walking chemical reaction after another. Anything that changes and affects your brain wave patterns is a “drug.” Drugs are sugar, sex, cigarettes, meditation and music!!
This blog is going to contain the contents of my first book. It is information from the personal struggle in my life recovering from love addiction and co-dependency while learning how to differentiate what complications I experience through having adult ADHD. ADHD convolutes, intensifies and compounds every single issue in my life from simply coping in a non-eventful, ordinary day, such as eating regularly to much deeper co-dependent (issues) thoughts, attitude, behavioral and emotional coping mechanisms that no longer work or serve me in adulthood.
I had a working title: How to Survive Manipulative Relationships in America; How to Be Happy and Have the Life You Always Wanted. If I could have found one book that answered all of my questions regarding how to change in my recovery, I would have bought it! My idea is to write such a book and since it touches on so many aspects of life, this blog seemed like an ideal way for me to share what I have learned with the world, freely. I hope anyone who wants to be happy or find love does. Don’t ever believe anyone that tells you, you cannot make a difference or that you cannot achieve your dreams because it only takes one small change to begin to see more possibilities.
The book is long and involved. Change requires a lot of effort and it is not easy but it is sure easier to make drastic changes yourself than to have life, circumstances or others decide for you. I desire to make this sort of an organic, living experience as it develops over time. I hope to create a relationship with others who are reading this and trying to make changes and/or seeking to find the love of their life. If you wish to write to me directly or ask questions along the way the final product will continue to morph based on my relationship with the readers.
I also want this to be a fun experience for me, so I am trying to abandon rules, rules about how to write “properly” because I want to make it easy to absorb, I am going to write the way I speak as it will be from my heart, experience and own unique perception.
I started my recovery journey in the rooms of Al-Anon which is a 12-step program for people who love and know alcoholics and addicts. I state this because yes, I am ACoA (an Adult Child of an Addict/Alcoholic) and without those two free programs of love and fellowship I would have never been able to change. However, I do have my own very strong beliefs and ideas and the way I have worked my own program is so un-orthodox many told me I would not be able to successfully recover the way I was doing it. They were proved wrong, I have found serenity and peace in my personal life, mind and soul. I found the partner of my life along this journey and he has always supported my growth in recovery, daily. It took me two years to realize this was the man I couldn’t live without.
None of us can be successful alone, no man is an island and being stingy and greedy does not allow love, life, creativity, money, joy et cetera to freely flow. Everything in life is energy and everything is connected. This energetic matrix is everywhere, in everything all around us in nature and animals. I am here to remind you that people are animals. No living thing is above another, I am alive just as the leaf is alive, I am light and air just as you are embodying this also.
I do speak of God, I will use the word, god, not HP- higher power as it is referred to in the (12-step) rooms. I realize many people, especially Americans are turned off by that word, please substitute another word like nature or universe in it’s place as the content of what I am saying is the point, not necessarily specific terms. To me god is energy, it is the willingness to create love divinely and forgive exponentially beyond measure infinitely. It embodies a higher compassionate understanding, loving and enlightenment, it is a way of being. You may be an atheist and you may very well be a deeply spiritual person – I do not see them as being mutually exclusive. No, I am a walking breathing dichotomy, such is life and spiritual lessons!
If you want forgiveness, you must first be willing to forgive yourself; if you want to be loved and accepted then you must first accept and be loving, compassionate and understanding towards yourself. It takes letting go, to receive openly and easily. If you are holding on so tightly already ~ you cannot possibly grasp what comes to you next. Being emotionally flooded sucks… if you feel over whelmed, reach out and talk to someone about it. Know that you are never alone with this, reach out.
I will be adding to this blog at my leisure during the weeks to come in the different sections. I have so much more freedom being able to put out what I wish and not attempt to whittle it down into a sliver of what it is to appease other people for “sales.” I am happy to say I have added the Daily Seed-Feed to the mix, you can follow intimately along in my personal recovery process starting from the middle of the fourth year up to now as that was when I first began saving the shares I typed in an online setting (meetings).
Without online meetings and that freedom of honesty… I would most likely be dead already. Thanks be to god for the fellowship as it saved my life. I am grateful to have a transparent and honest life as an anonymous member of the twelve step fellowships that saved me. Thank you to all of you as everyone has helped me to allow this new growth in my life. I give it up to god and those with the messages to continue to carry them on. Gratitude is one of them, after being suicidal just waking up and being alive each new day and having breath alone — is something that I automatically am Blessed to realize, I am alive! Now onto the thrive!