DSF35 Topics: “the 3 A’s Awareness, Acceptance, Action; Powerlessness; Enabling vs Support”
Topics: ”the 3 A’s Awareness, Acceptance, Action; Powerlessness; Enabling vs Support” from 4-8-2010
Hi everyone, I am grateful to be here today.
When I first got here, I enalbed in so many ways
and had no idea I was doing that
by focusing on other people
obsessing about their lives – I was constantly enabling them and “disabling” myself.
I was out of control myself.
As I was always pointing at others (finding fault with them) while
neglecting and ignoring myself.
In the beginning I fought focusing on me, even though I was trying to do it.
The first year I was here
I felt constantly guilty focusing on me too
it wasnt what I was used to.
Anything new is going to be a little scary, it is new after all.
I also felt extremely hopeless about everything in general.
Accepting powerlessness is not accepting hopelessness
in fact I found it to be the opposite.
When I did accept that I could not control anyone else or anything else in life
I had to look at myself
and be responsible for me, where I was at in my life.
I felt insane the more I looked at my own behavior
and was beginning to own it and make changes.
The changes are empowering
you are giving yourself your own power back and it feels really good because you are doing it yourself, it is your own impetus/motivation.
To see your efforts actually working for a change is very fulfilling. To lose the resentment feels incredible.
I had to throw out alot of what I had learned as a child in a dysfunctional home.
We pick up “coping mechanisms” in an unhealthy environemnt
and they don’t really work that well in the real world.
We are children in the dark, being lead by insanity. It wasn’t hard to let go of what wasn’t working because I was willing
and ready to change and try anything to help me feel better.
I listened hard to those that seemed to have found that peace
in their lives.
I took suggestions from them, and applied it to my life.
I kept what worked for me and opened my mind
because things can work later, you just never know what can apply until you try it. Maybe this technique will work later. I shelved what did not work in the moment and still kept an open mind because it might later on.
I was very willing to admit what I did not know which seemed like it was everything at first.
I gave in to this process of recovery, trying and I quit comparing myself.
I threw out the “good” and the “bad” expectations I had and I
and got into right now – today – this moment.
I realized that life can still surprise me ~ when you’re not all jaded assuming/expecting the worst and
I can still surprise myself, too.
This new moment is where I have found so many wonderful things that life has to offer me
and I can cope better.
Right now I can implement a change for me, to empower my life.
I thought focusing on me, was selfish at first.
I have come to realize that it is healthy behavior,
it is for self-preservation
I refer and surrender my will and my way to God. I am grateful I became willing and teachable here.
Focus on what you want to manifest and what you want in life, do not focus on your biggest fears and what you do not want.
What we focus on grows and the program does work when we work actively work it for ourselves.
What you put into it – you get back
and it keeps expanding my peace, awareness, compassion and understanding.
You are worth it.