DSF54 Topics: “Focusing on myself; Self-love; Acceptance”
Topics: “Focusing on myself; Self-love; Acceptance” from 8-4-2010
Hi all, I am very grateful to be here, working it with all of you.
These are great topics and they truly all go together for me.
I spent the first two years in program here
getting “me” into focus
and then on discovering what self-love actually is/was.
I was born with this heightened sense of awareness
but man, did I fight and resist life at every turn!
I was extremely insecure and
Coming here, letting it all go and starting fresh with new info and
the willingness to try new skills
it has paid off here, tremendously.
I didn’t know how to love me
so I started with simple and kind.
I too, had to stop comparing myself, judging myself and beating me up
I had to -accept me right where I was at
39 years old, fat, exhausted emotionally.
Well, ok so with acceptance I got to-
there is more of me to love
and it is something I can change it is
not a defect of permanence.
You know, I can change it if I really want to, one day at a time.
Acceptance goes a long way towards understanding something or someone.
I have told men that my whole dating life, if you want to understand me, accept me as I am.
Well, I wasn’t doing that for others.
Who wants to be around someone, constantly picking at them? No one. People who cannot accept are not very healthy.
Besides, who made me god of all of what life should be?
I had to avoid my mom for about a year to get in touch with my own thoughts and mind.
I didn’t like her life much back then and it was hard for me to cope with/accept.
I was detaching, trying to make my own way emotionally with boundaries/consequences.
I was growing in self-love, so much so that
I no longer believed the less than kind words from others about me/life.
People are always putting themselves (projecting their issues) onto others
and as a member here always says – “we don’t see the world as it is
we see it as we are.”
It is all perceptual and with different behavior – I found my attitude, perception and perspective all changing
for the better.
I am so free now that I give others the dignity and respect to be themselves
and I work on me, doing the same, taking my own dignity and respect.
Detachment and focusing on me
are two sides of the same coin, they go together.
The way I changed back then
was I would catch my thoughts
being harsh, cruel and/or judgmental to self.
I would recognize it, re-direct it to a wholly positive statement
like, “sorry self you don’t deserve that harsh judgment”
and feed my mind a healthier thought after forgiving my negativity and releasing it.
I use my own- daily magic question: what can I do to allow me to feel better right now/today about myself or my situation?
And then following through on the answer for me.
The more I step back from my ego, surrender to hp/god and
focus on the simple things in my day
I feel closer and closer to hp I feel.
My understanding keeps growing
for this and many other miraculous blessings I have witnessed and experienced
I am not only eternally grateful but will continue my practice in program.
I’ve discovered that the only way to have love, forgiveness, peace and hope
is to practice it daily, consciously and
that is how I keep it.
If you don’t love you yet, I can tell you that you are worth it
and you deserve your own best love and loving kindness in action.
Keep coming back, it works when we work it!